THE ROYAL SUITE, FOUR SEASONS WESTCLIFF, JOHANNESBURG
Price per room per night: From R65,000
The Four Seasons Westcliff occupies one of the best locations in Joburg, high on a hill overlooking an area called The Parks, with panoramic views over some of the city's loveliest green spaces.
The hotel's "presidential" offering is called the Royal Suite. It stretches over three private floors and includes a grand entrance lobby and personal elevator.
The top floor is home to the master bedroom, while the dining room is on the middle floor, along with a study, lounge, gym and pantry/preparation area with a separate external entrance (for the staff, of course).
The three full bathrooms all have new marble interiors and finishes with a free-standing bath and separate shower. And if you entertain, rest assured there's also a handy guest loo to keep your travelling toiletries a personal matter.
If you've got more pressing privacy to protect, you can also have a private gate, vehicle and even helicopter access — on request.
PRESIDENTIAL SUITE, TWELVE APOSTLES HOTEL, CAPE TOWN
Price of the room per night: From R60,000
Your personal butler will ensure your every whim is catered for, but will recede quietly into the background when you want some privacy to enjoy the incredible space that is the Twelve Apostles Hotel's presidential suite.
There's a grand master bedroom with "his and hers" marble bathrooms, a private lounge, a dining room for up to eight guest, a private bar, and a personal kitchen (just get the butler to whip something up).
Of course, the wraparound terrace is itself wrapped in incredible views of the Atlantic, Lion's Head and the Twelve Apostles mountain range.
Some extra-special treatment, if you ask, includes a bar stocked to your liking, an in-room breakfast picnic and a decadent midnight feast.
As if the room alone isn't spectacular enough, the rate does include a whack of super-fabulous perks, including biltong in your room, a couple's massage, a sunset cocktail in the Leopard Bar, rose petals strewn across your bed, wine tasting with the hotel sommelier, and breakfast with sparkling wine and oysters.
PRESIDENTIAL SUITE, ONE&ONLY CAPE TOWN
Price of the room per night: From R89,600 (excludes R40 tourism levy per room per night)
The enormous presidential suite at the One&Only has two bedrooms, both with king-sized beds and walk-in closets, plus a dining room that seats up to 12 people. The master bedroom also has "his-and-hers" en-suites, each of which has its own steam room. Wow.
There are also two lounges, a private gym (with massage bed) and a butler’s kitchen with separate access, so you barely have to be aware that the staff are there. Said butler, however, is on call 24-hour-a-day if you need anything.
Works by South Africa’s finest artists hang on the walls, but they have to compete with floor-to-ceiling windows and views of Table Mountain, pretty much from every room, as well as a balcony that runs the length of the space. There's also a media room for movies, a kitchenette, and a small gym.
The rate includes breakfast daily at Reuben's, one of the hotel's two restaurants. It is, of course, named after its chef, the homegrown culinary hero Reuben Riffel. The other restaurant is Nobu. (You'll pay extra if you want to eat in your room.)
PRESIDENTIAL SUITE, THE OYSTER BOX, UMHLANGA
Price of the room per night: From R50,000
There's something reminiscent of old European palaces in the Oyster Box's presidential suite with its Venetian-glass chandelier, mirrors and marble, plus the Baby Grand Piano in the lounge.
Spread out over two levels with a private lift, the suite also has a bar, kitchen, eight-seater dining room and a patio with private rim-flow plunge pool - along with 180-degree ocean views.
Some extra perks for those who ask include an in-room breakfast picnic or decadent midnight feast, a 24-hour butler service and valet parking, rose petals on your bed, plus free daily laundry.
PRESIDENTIAL SUITE, SANDTON SUN, JOHANNESBURG
Price per room per night: around R20,000
The Sandton Sun, excellently located for business travellers and tourists, is consistently one of the top-rated hotels on guest-review sites such as booking.com. For the budget-conscious fabulous person, it's also quite the bargain.
High fliers can choose from not just one but three presidential suites, and when we say high... we mean it. The suites are located on the 18th, 19th and 20th floors, and so all offer stunning views of the city.
Each room has a separate lounge, dining room, guest toilet and bedroom with en-suite bathroom. They have automation systems that manage the lights, and telescopes for stargazing.
The one on the 20th floor has two levels with an outdoor dining area, jacuzzi and private bar.