From left: Semi-pendant light from Gubi. Distinct side Table from Ferm Living. Multi-light floor lamp from Gubi. Trees wallpaper by Katie Scott in grey from Ferm Living. Five Pouf from Muuto. Solo rug from Ligne Roset. Flora three-seater sofa from Woud.
From left: Semi-pendant light from Gubi. Distinct side Table from Ferm Living. Multi-light floor lamp from Gubi. Trees wallpaper by Katie Scott in grey from Ferm Living. Five Pouf from Muuto. Solo rug from Ligne Roset. Flora three-seater sofa from Woud.
Image: Supplied

Like a 3D Rorschach blot or a Myers-Briggs multiple choice of scatter cushions and sconces, how you doll up your home says a lot about you. Use this handy guide to swiftly make it, fake it — or categorise your next dinner-party neighbour. Alternatively, you could just covet some of these gorgeous décor items.

1. THE NEXT-GEN WASP

THIS IS YOUR VIBE IF YOU LIKE:

  • Perfectly oversized linen or leather
  • Chesterfield couches
  • Floral prints
  • Nautical anything
  • A statement wallpaper in the guest loo
  • Black-and-white checkerboard marble floors
  • Piped scatters (must be filled with down inners)
  • A nice ticking stripe
  • Ardmore ceramics
  • Malawi cane chairs
  • Fireplaces
  • Woven baskets
  • Ikat and suzani fabrics

YOU SHOULD SHOP AT:

For art: Everard Read for the classics and Chandler House for the young guns.

For more furniture and fittings in the style: Cécile & Boyd, Pezula Interiors, Gatehouse, Victorian Bathrooms, St Leger & Viney and Mavromac.

READ: English décor magazines, biographies on the Mitfords, Churchill, and anything by Graham Viney.

From left: Semi-pendant light from Gubi. Lowry sideboard from Pinch Design. The Derome table lamp from Pinch Design. Natural agate side table from @Home Living Spaces. Sandberg Pine wallpaper from Silk and Cotton. Satellite pendant light from Gubi. Stay sofa from Gubi. Multi-lite floor lamp from Gubi. Trees wallpaper by Katie Scott in grey from Ferm Living. ST Column dining table from Gubi. Shell pot from Ferm Living. Grand-piano sofa from Gubi.
From left: Semi-pendant light from Gubi. Lowry sideboard from Pinch Design. The Derome table lamp from Pinch Design. Natural agate side table from @Home Living Spaces. Sandberg Pine wallpaper from Silk and Cotton. Satellite pendant light from Gubi. Stay sofa from Gubi. Multi-lite floor lamp from Gubi. Trees wallpaper by Katie Scott in grey from Ferm Living. ST Column dining table from Gubi. Shell pot from Ferm Living. Grand-piano sofa from Gubi.
Image: Supplied

WATCH: The Crown, Planet Earth, and Antiques Roadshow.

NEVER BE SEEN WITHOUT: Hunter boots, a barbour jacket, a pashmina, a Panama hat, and a touch of Liberty print.

STOCK YOUR FRIDGE WITH: Hendrick’s gin and ingredients to make one of Susan Greig’s latest recipes .

HOLIDAY IN: Plett and Jaipur — for the block-printed fabrics, obvs.

2. THE MOD MINIMALIST

THIS IS YOUR VIBE IF YOU LIKE:

  • Marie Kondo
  • G Plan furniture from the 1960s
  • Bauhaus
  • Drinks trolleys
  • Contemporary art
  • A pop of colour (preferably terracotta or petrol blue)
  • Retro glass
  • Walter Battiss and Eduardo Villa
  • Expensive oud candles

YOU SHOULD SHOP AT:

For art: Jeremy Stephen Antiques, Stevenson Gallery, Russell Kaplan Auctioneers

From left: The Frey Armoire from Pinch Design. Triangle pendant light from Kare Design. Outline sofa from Muuto. BL4 floorlamp from Gubi. 62 Desk from Gubi. Solo rug from Ligne Roset. Herman lounge chair from Ferm Living. Random light from Weylandts. Diva day bed from Gubi. TS poufe from Gubi. Pebble rug from Muuto. Airy coffee table from Muuto. Airy coffee tab from Muuto. Pebble rug from Muuto. Flos Copycat table lamp from Crema Design. Musculo loung chair from Gubi.
From left: The Frey Armoire from Pinch Design. Triangle pendant light from Kare Design. Outline sofa from Muuto. BL4 floorlamp from Gubi. 62 Desk from Gubi. Solo rug from Ligne Roset. Herman lounge chair from Ferm Living. Random light from Weylandts. Diva day bed from Gubi. TS poufe from Gubi. Pebble rug from Muuto. Airy coffee table from Muuto. Airy coffee tab from Muuto. Pebble rug from Muuto. Flos Copycat table lamp from Crema Design. Musculo loung chair from Gubi.
Image: Supplied

For more furniture and fittings in the style: Tonic Design, Anatomy Design, Gregor Jenkin, Guild Gallery, OKHA. StudioMAS better design your house, or you’re going to have to nab an original Michael Sutton or Gabriel Fagan pad.

READ: Monocle, The Fountainhead by Ayn Rand, graphic novels, and the FT Weekend.

WATCH: Don’t bother. It’s too fringe and directional to actually be enjoyable.

LISTEN TO: Podcasts.

NEVER BE SEEN WITHOUT: A bespoke white shirt, a glass of prosecco, a 1970s Merc, and Ae¯sop beauty products.

HOLIDAY IN: Plett and Puglia.

3. THE BOUGIE BOHEMIAN

THIS IS YOUR VIBE IF YOU LIKE:

  • Incense
  • Kelim and Berber rugs
  • Woven baskets
  • Peacock-shaped, rattan headboards
  • Macramé
  • Tassels
  • A Mexican flaming-heart mirror
  • Bamboo cutlery and crockery
  • Reclaimed wood picture frames
  • 100% natural-fibre, T-shirt-material bedding
  • Indoor plants
  • Worn tan leather sofas and Moroccan poofs

YOU SHOULD SHOP AT:

For art: From the place the mom in the school car park said you’d platz for.

From left: Mae Engelgeer Ultimate Bliss rug from CC–Tapis. Multi-lite pendant with rose dust shade from Gubi. Outline sofa from Muuto. Borders Kelim rug from Ferm Living. Adnet wall mirror from Gubi. Gonsenhausers Nourison Nepal rug in Everest Fawn from Fine Rugs. Insert side table from Ferm Living. Gubi Grasshopper floor lamp from Gubi. Fox lounge chair from Sika Design. Belladonna sofa from Sika Design. Squares Kelim Rug from Ferm Living. Distinct side table from Ferm Living. Five pouf from Muuto. 62 dresser from Gubi.
From left: Mae Engelgeer Ultimate Bliss rug from CC–Tapis. Multi-lite pendant with rose dust shade from Gubi. Outline sofa from Muuto. Borders Kelim rug from Ferm Living. Adnet wall mirror from Gubi. Gonsenhausers Nourison Nepal rug in Everest Fawn from Fine Rugs. Insert side table from Ferm Living. Gubi Grasshopper floor lamp from Gubi. Fox lounge chair from Sika Design. Belladonna sofa from Sika Design. Squares Kelim Rug from Ferm Living. Distinct side table from Ferm Living. Five pouf from Muuto. 62 dresser from Gubi.
Image: Supplied

For more furniture and fittings in the style:The Storer, Weylandts, and online stores La Vie Boheme and Furbelow.

READ: Your aura, the Goop website, Let My People Go Surfing by Patagonia founder Yvon Chouinard, and Shantaram by Gregory David Roberts (just kidding, you’re not going to read the latter — it’s just next to your bed for show).

DABBLE IN: Veganism, mindfulness, and slacktivism.

WATCH: YouTube videos about lymph drainage.

LISTEN TO: Podcasts

NEVER BE SEEN WITHOUT: Yoga pants and green juice.

HOLIDAY IN: Plett and at AfrikaBurn, where you pay someone to pitch you a luxe tent.

OH, AND ONE MORE THING...

IT’S A NO FROM US:
Irrespective of your aesthetic leanings, the following are perennially verboten:

  • High-shine, white floor tiles
  • Thatched bomas and indoor bars
  • Pseudo-Tuscan/Balinese/Provençal anything
  • White/cream/pastel leather couches • synthetic lace curtains
  • Decorative words displayed on a wall. Happy, love, peace — no!
  • Copper clocks in the shape of Africa
  • Furniture made from railway sleepers
  • Rusty metal anything
  • Cement owls with glass eyes that you got in Nieu-Bethesda
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